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conversations with myself

mihaela hozmache

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10th of April 2017

My dearest boy,

The risk was never that I might not like you. The risk was always that I might do.

And I did.

Thank you for the memories. And for the inspiration. I left Athens with a new perspective on life. Somewhere in between your smile and the poems written in bad hand writing on your kitchen wall, I found a part of me that I was missing.

In a parallel universe, on Planet 23, last weekend is repeating itself in a continuous loop.

Σε φιλώ

Μιχαελα

 

 

 

 

 

#talkingtothegods

Remember when, at the Acropolis, I asked you for passionate love and some millions? Can we make it passionate love, some millions and  a 12 for my thesis? Thanks. #talkingtothegods

You never do until you do it.

I grew angel wings today. like the ones people tattoo on their backs. Some also with ink. And I flew. I was on Stokcholmsgade. Nobody saw me. But I did. She said I can always learn to fly. And I never did until I did it. I was looking at everything from above and I felt it in my stomach. That’s where I physically feel happiness. And sorrow. The same place, the same sensation. Isn’t it ironic? No, not really. It is like that by design.

By the time I got to Lundsgade, I was invincible. But only after I stopped fighting. All the way from the station I was trying so hard to keep myself covered, protected. The wind was blowing so cold… And he stubbornly managed to get underneath my hood no matter what I did. So fuck it! I’m gonna remove my hood and feel the cold. But feel it. Acknowledge it. Because you know, what you resist persists. Once I started feeling it, it went away. It was not the cold. It was never the cold. The same way it was never Denmark.

It’s your mind.

 

 

23 of 2016

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I don’t like even numbers. Or years, for that matter. I’m looking forward for 2017, that’s for sure. But if we are to stick to tradition, here’s the 23 of 2016:

  1. I started working at Novo Nordisk and I love it. So much, that I’m now going there everyday.
  2. I got a 12 for Management of Change with less than 2 days of studying. I call that hustling.
  3. I traveled more than usually – Bucharest, Constanta, Milan, Bucharest, Constanta, Chania, Athens, Nicosia. Spent some quality time with friends, family and the Gods.
  4. I finally moved close to Svanemøllen, my favourite place in Copenhagen. I also moved away from Svanemøllen, because, of course…
  5. I officiated my relationship with Denmark and became a permanent resident. Jeg er en kartoffel nu.
  6. I joined Toastmasters. I can almost improvise now.
  7. I said my final goodbye. To that part of me you kept me from forgetting.
  8. I finally got my long red nails and turned them into a leitmotif. For connoisseurs.
  9. I drank a bottle of champagne. Over Skype. What were we celebrating? Cristian, don’t answer this!!!
  10. I failed two interviews with some consulting companies. I like Novo better anyways.
  11. I turned a quarter of a century. Now I can distinguish between left and right.
  12. I regained lost friendships, for which I’m deeply grateful. Doua ore la telefon? Doamne fereste!
  13. I drove a small Peugeot – oh, the irony – through the rocky Cretan mountains. And I only killed the engine when I parked.
  14. The Shaw, once again, gave me what I wanted the most. Do remember that I changed address, please!
  15. I ran ALL the 5 kilometers of the DHL race. And then went to the doctor with a dislocated knee.
  16. My sister and my best friend announced that they’re getting married. Not to each other, though.
  17. I became a member of the Young Project Management Professional Network. I am the future!
  18. I partied 6 nights straight in Oppa, with tequila and Greek music. And some rum. Then I got sick.
  19. I became famous. There are HM tags all over Copenhagen.
  20. I passes my both summer courses at CBS with a total of 6 hours of studying. I got 12 for one of them. DTU is just much better, sorry CBS…
  21. I started writing my Master Thesis and I’m in the process of becoming an Earned Value Management specialist. Keel, are you reading this?
  22. I moved to the fanciest neighborhood of Copenhagen and joined the high class.
  23. I managed to sleep 4 hours and not to be grumpy the next day. And that’s by far the greatest achievement of 2016.

This is gonna be good.

18th of December 2016

I was looking at my empty bookshelf, mopping the carpetless floor and I suddenly got sad. Maybe it was the song. Maybe I’m way too sensitive. Maybe it’s just that these past days have been crazy. 

Or maybe it’s just that we leave a part of us everywhere we leave from. I’m extremely happy to move to Kartoffelrækkerne. It’s one of the fanciest neighbourhoods in Copenhagen and I love it. Still… I felt the same for this one when I moved. I don’t want to stay, don’t get me wrong. But somehow it’s sad to leave 🙂

 Looking backwards, many of the saddest times in my life turn out to be the happiest. So I *must* be happy now. Yeah. This is gonna be good. Why else would I be crying?

Day 368

8th of December 2016


10PM. Still at the office. Thesis life.

Day 365

6th of December 2016

Full circle. Or is it?

Day 364

5th of December 2016

Thank you, Lars. I lige mode. 

Day 360

2nd of December 2016

I went to Halifax with the guys. And the service was so, but so good!! It really made my evening even better 🙂

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