Day 156

14th of May 2016

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If Greece I love for the chaos and the joy, so I love Denmark for the peace and the sorrow.

The way you love someone you’re being in a relationship with because it’s comfortable and you feel safe. You’re not in love, your heart doesn’t beat faster when you see him, but you try. You tell yourself it will come with time. Then 5 years pass by. And nothing.

I’ve been in a relationship like this before. It never lasts. And as it was the case then, I won’t try to leave, because I don’t have the courage. So I’m gonna enjoy you for now. With all your benefits and comfort. And in my efforts to feel something, I’ll tell you that “I love you” many times. Because, remember, a woman always says “I love you” when she feels it the least. But we both know we can’t lie to each other forever.

The time will come when I will leave and not look back. Because I might not leave easily. I might even come back many times if I do. But when I can’t be myself in a relationship, one way or the other, I find my way out.

As an old friend would say, I have too much life in me for you.

I am grateful to you for all the opportunities you provided me with and for all the parts of me I couldn’t have discovered anyway else, but we’re too different. Irreconcilable.

On the bright side, you’re very pretty, Denmark. Beautiful. And you know I have a weakness for good looks.

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