conversations with myself

mihaela hozmache


December 2015

23 of 2015

31st of December 2015


The 23 that made 2015 one of the best years so far:

  1. I started my Master in Engineering Management at the Technical University of Denmark. One of the biggest accomplishments and the best choice of career path, provided my background.
  2. I found a part-time job and for the first time in my life I fully supported myself financially.
  3. I was lucky enough to get out of a relationship I wasn’t happy with.
  4. I had interviews with large international companies and I am grateful for finally getting my dream job.
  5. I met wonderful people at DTU who became my friends.
  6. I talked more Greek that I could ever imagine to do in Copenhagen. I will finish DTU being fluent not in Danish, but Italian and Greek.
  7. I lost 8 kg.
  8. I started this blog.
  9. I bought a double bed and rearranged my room to make it cozy. And red.
  10. I went to Greece with my best friend. I swam in the Mediterranean and felt free. By the way, how deep is your love?
  11. I was a straight 12 student in the first semester.
  12. I became a Teacher Assistant at DTU. TEMO is and will probably be the best course I have ever taken and the one which convinced me that management was the best choice.
  13. I took a summer course at the Copenhagen Business School.
  14. I discovered Copenhagen and realised that this city is also my home.
  15. I worked hard. Hard as hell. There were many weeks in which I would leave home at 7 in the morning and come back after 12 at night. School, work, sleep, repeat. I was stressed, I occasionally broke down and cried. But I am so, so proud for having gone through that successfully.
  16. I said goodbye to my phone. Kay. It was not just a phone. It was my first real smartphone and the only one I struggled to buy. We had no money to buy this one. And I cherished it. I bought the new Nexus. But you know what they say about first loves.
  17. I discovered my personality type. INFJ. Less than one percent of the world population has it. That’s how special I am, haha. I understood who I am and what I need to do to be happy.
  18. I helped people in Africa get clean water as a birthday gift to myself.
  19. I drove. Although I still don’t own a car, I drove a lot this year.
  20. Had wonderful breakfasts and dinners on the terrace with my room mate and realised that home is where you’re happy. It’s not a place.
  21. I still have superhuman powers. I still have a powerful connection with the people that are important to me. No matter how many years pass or how long the distance.
  22. I was lucky enough to work with wonderful people. We worked hard, but had fun in the process. I am honoured to have had inspiring people around me, that are able to smile and keep a positive attitude even when their houses were destroyed by earthquakes. Now that’s a powerful lesson I have learned.
  23. I fell in love. I felt. After a long time I felt again the type of love I was longing for.


“Do the best you can until you know better. Then, when you know better, do better.”  Maya Angelou

Day 21

30th of December 2015

IMG_20151230_224259.jpgMy mom brought me a rose!

Day 20

29th of December 2015

IMG_20151229_234541.jpgI love this.

Day 19

28th of December 2015


Today is about the joy of watching a good series. It’s something I haven’t done in a long while. It caught me. Mainly because it’s about love. But real love, as in real life. Where people don’t always end up together.

Numele ei îmi va face mereu inima să-mi bată mai repede. Însă niciodatã n-o să mai fie lângă mine.

Day 18

27th of December 2015

IMG_20151227_221500Rina and the joy of being young and innocent.

Day 17

26th of December 2015


We went to Kakopetria today. Clear sky, stars and crisp air. And peace. Inner peace. In a way, I grew up in Kakopetria. I spent there many summers of my life. That’s where I learnt Greek. That’s where I had my first job. That’s where I first understood that loves goes away.

On the way back, we listened to “elly’s music”, which is a folder I made 6 years ago on a USB stick that my dad still keeps in his car. I was surprised to see that most of those songs I still listen to today. They were almost all sad songs. Obviously. Being melancholic was the comfort zone of my teenagehood. But the heart warming part is that today I listened to them and I smiled. I once told someone that the biggest joy is to listen to a song that you used to cry on and smile. As a metaphore for life, of course.

Those songs were mostly dedicated to my soulmate. And yes, I have one. And no, we’re not together. And hopefully, we’ll meet again in our next life. There’s a theory according to which the soulmate is someone who comes along, changes your life for the better and then leaves. Soulmates are not made to be together for life.

In the end, that would be so boring. All that bliss, perfection, all that joy and love. Keep them for too long and they’ll become trivial. Or will they?

Nevertheless, the thing that I’m most grateful for today is that I just had a conversation with my soulmate and I felt at home again. In 3 days there will be 6 years since we met. 29th of December. Although I have 23 tattood on my back, 29 is tattood on my soul. We grew up and grew apart, with completely different paths. But we can still talk like nothing changed. And we still understand each other without words. And he is still the only one who knows how to deal with my crazyness. Yet.

I loved other people since. I am in love now and I know I will love again. And every love is unique and has a limited time frame. So do projects. And like projects, they also have deliverables. Memories.

A fost perfect.

Day 16

25th of December 2015

Today I’m grateful because everything eventually turns out right.

Day 15

24th of December 2015


Today I’m grateful for finally buying from that brand I could never afford before. And I know I should be less superficial than that. But sometimes, it just feels good.


Day 14

23rd of December 2015
– the best day of the year


And not because it was sunny and 18 degrees. Not even because I spent the day cooking with mom and the evening having deep conversations with dad. But because I felt happy and carefree. Like everything is well in the world and even what’s not is figureoutable. This state of mind that makes life good, everything worth it and dreams come true. That’s what I’m grateful for today.

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